‘Love my tribe’, ‘squad goals’, ‘good vibe tribe’, ‘girl squad’, ‘wolfpack’… Sound familiar? It should, because it is literally everywhere these days; on t-shirts, prints, coffee mugs, hashtags and so forth. The influx of these cute little catch-phrases are here to stay, it seems.
I honestly wouldn’t have given it a second thought until a recent conversation I had with a new mom, who expressed that she was having troubles finding her ‘tribe’. This appealed to the codependent in me, and it got me wondering if this whole ‘tribe’ business felt like the new ‘you can’t sit with us’, to some people. I am a person who by nature, wants people to feel included; maybe because I know how terrible it feels to be excluded. Ahh the woes of an empath… But I digress. As a person who has often referred to my community as my ‘tribe’, mostly for lack of better word, I certainly do not want to perpetuate an idea of exclusivity, (especially in the mama community).
So then begs the question I have to ask myself, what exactly is my tribe?
In all honesty, I have never really felt ‘a part of’, when it comes to groups or cliques or ‘tribes’. I am sure there is a deep, psychological reason for this, but let’s not hijack this post with that business. What I do feel ‘a part of’, is individual relationships and connections; In fact, I thrive in those types of settings. When I really examine this whole idea of a tribe, what it boils down to is not so much some imaginary boundary of a select group of people. It is intended to be inclusive. It is meant to refer to the connectedness we can all share through relating honestly.
So if you’re struggling to feel a part of, (especially you new mamas), know that you are a part of my tribe, and you can most definitely sit with us.
‘Society exists only as a mental concept; in the real world there are only individuals.” -Oscar Wilde